Amber

Hey y'all, basic social niceties dictate the following:

• You do not come into someone you’re friendly with’s tinychat with the intention of hooking up with her ex.
• You do not continue to talk to someone’s ex when they’ve told you it makes them very uncomfortable and affects their mental health.
• You do not continue even when you visibly see it affecting their mental health.
• You do not lie about being ‘just friends’ with this person’s ex while he’s planning an 8 hour car ride to come fuck you.
• You do not start an entire relationship based on lies, deceit, and attention whoring.
• You listen when people tell you that they’re bad news, and that they used to make fun of you with them.
• All of this especially applies when when you’re tumblr famous and the person whose emotional health you’re affecting has to see it all over her dash.
• You do not fuck with people’s emotions.
• You do not feel ‘really happy’ when you see how much you’re hurting someone and continue with no guilt.
• You don’t prove that you are the person you’re claiming not to be regardless of a ton of evidence by intentionally being hurtful and willfully malicious.
• you don’t tell only one side of the story so that people will ~be on your side~ and it makes you look good.

Now you have a checklist of what not to do and you can move forward accordingly!

apparently I have to school some people's asses on being poor again

elfstaranymore:

Listen up, Tumblr. There are some cold hard facts about being poor that you need to know before you try to talk to me or my family or any other poor person about anything involving money, food, jobs, housing or healthcare.

• Being poor is expensive as fuck. Living paycheck-to-paycheck means you can't shell out lots of money at once for a reliable car, so you have to buy a used car that might break down more often. Or maybe you can't pay monthly insurance costs so you end up with a $2000 emergency room bill. Renting costs more in the long run than owning. And so on.
• Asking for money doesn't fucking hurt anybody. As long as you ask in a way that is not abusive or coercive, you should not feel ashamed if you sometimes have to ask for money. ESPECIALLY if you do it via crowdsourcing or some other method that doesn't put pressure on any one person. Don't you dare shame a poor person for asking for help taking care of themselves or their family.
• Sometimes poor people have nice things. Yeah, I fucking said it. I have a nice TV and some game consoles that I bought when money was less tight. In fact, anytime a poor person gets an unexpected sum of money, like a birthday gift or a tax return, it often goes to something like that. Know why? Because we know we might never get another chance to buy the thing. And being resourceful people, we also know that if we have a chance to buy a nice thing now it will cost less in the long run than buying a neverending series of things that break after a month. We also get really fucking tired of always looking like poor people to everyone else. It sucks always being the house nobody wants to visit because somebody else can afford an XBOX 360 and you can't. Finally, you don't fucking know where that nice thing a poor person has came from. Maybe it was a gift, or somebody gave them a Best Buy gift card and they bought a laptop. Maybe a rich person was giving it away on Craigslist. Maybe the person wasn't always poor but shit got hard recently. Maybe they actually saved up pennies for a year to buy it. You don't know, and it's not actually your business anyway.
• Healthy food is more expensive than unhealthy food. I'm not going to even argue this point, I'm just going to fucking shout it. HEALTHY FOOD IS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN UNHEALTHY FOOD.
• It's none of your business why someone is poor. Maybe they have a disability, maybe unemployment is high in their field, maybe they are part of a group that has been socioeconomically oppressed for generations and you don't just fucking pull your bootstraps up out of that. I've never met anybody who was poor just for the hell of it. But you know what? Some people are poor because they made irresponsible decisions or they're addicted to drugs or gambling. Those people are still people and they still deserve food and shelter.
• You can't always get what you need at a thrift store or garage sale, and if you can, it still costs money. Some people have never actually set foot in a thrift store, so let me tell you what they're like. There are rows and rows of clothes that are ugly or have holes in them or don't fit you. And by ugly, I mean ugly-sweater-party ugly, like if I wore that to work I'd get fired ugly. If you're REALLY lucky you might find ONE OR TWO things that fit and won't fall apart after one washing. If you're fat, trans or having other specific clothing needs it's even worse. These are clothes that people rejected, and most of the time it was for a reason. Then there's a lot of sketchy appliances from 1973 that somebody cleaned out of their mom's garage after she died, toys for children 3 and under but fuck you if you have a ten-year-old, etc. They can be surprisingly good places to find books and Disney VHS tapes, but that's about it.
• For similar reasons, things like Freecycle are spotty as hell. I live in a major metropolitan area. Currently, the things that are available on my local Freecycle list include an automatic pet water dish, various non-essential baby supplies, a "microwave splatter cover", and a couple of office chairs. This is pretty representative of what is generally offered. It's not a great place to get things you specifically need.
• There is no such thing as the welfare queen. This could be an entire post by itself, but let me give you a quick run-down of what 'welfare' usually consists of. This varies by state, but the aid available in Massachusetts includes food stamps ($200 a month max, doesn't buy things like toilet paper, diapers or pet food), Emergency Aid for Elders, Disabled and Children ($300/month max if you qualify, you obviously have to be elderly, disabled or have children, and have to have almost nothing in your bank account), MassHealth insurance (actually pretty good but the application process can be long, and the state penalizes you by withholding some of your tax return if you go too long without insurance), and Section 8 housing vouchers, for which there is a waiting list of a year or more. If you manage to qualify for EVERYTHING, and you don't have any kids, you might manage to scrape together enough to live off of. But barely. And MA is one of the better states for stuff like this.

There is probably a lot more shit I could tell you about what it's like to be poor, but I'm tired and achy and so done with this shit, so I'm gonna stop here.

Hey so I was totally talking about this with Tati when she was here last week!

I’m forever disgusted with people who tell me, ‘you can’t be THAT poor, you have an iphone/macbook/internet connection!’ People who say shit like that have never, EVER lived in poverty. Sometimes poor people don’t want to feel poor. So those couple times a year when we get our taxes back, or a refund from financial aid, or a bonus, we treat ourselves to some nice things that will still be there even when the money isn’t.

“have you tried looking for cheaper car insurance?”

“why don’t you go on food stamps?”

“but don’t you work full time?”

“how dare you have a donate link on your blog, get a job/a better job/stop spending money on _______!’

The way that people think they can judge people who are in poverty is fucking disgusting and I can’t stand it.

Writing with dry erase marker when you're left handed is...

Writing with dry erase marker when you're left handed is actual hell, but this quote is super relevant to my life. #katenash #quote

Number one rule: don't fuck with me, and don't fuck with my emotions.

I will do anything in the name of self preservation.

I make NO apologies for that.

This weather tonight is awful.

Kind of like some people’s consciences.

If you think I haven’t seen you constantly refreshing my tumblr for the scoop, you’re really fucking stupid (nothing I didn’t already know.)

You are both shitty excuses for human beings and I hope someday you fully understand the repercussions of what you’ve done.

Eternal love for Mrs. Hudson.

Eternal love for Mrs. Hudson.

Hey there, I just wondered- what do you think of the overweight/obese/morbidly obese or people who are extremely or quite underweight having jobs in the health sector? Do you think this is slightly hypocritical? And what if their weight affects their work, like affects them being able to do certain things?

I mean, are you seriously asking me this question and expecting me not to be hugely offended by it?

I could spend hours tearing everything apart that you just said, but I'm going to stick to two main points.

WEIGHT ≠ HEALTH.

You can be 'morbidly obese' and healthy. You can be 'quite underweight' and still be healthy. Bodies come in MYRIAD shapes and sizes, and ALL of them can be healthy or unhealthy. You are conflating weight and health, and that's your first big problem, and something you need to stop doing immediately.

SO WHAT?

Even if someone is unhealthy in their own body, why do you assume that makes them unable to care for other people? My mother's been an LPN for 40 years, and she's been obese that entire time. She and I used to work at the same place, she left over a year ago, and I STILL have people come up to me and consistently tell me that she was the best nurse they have EVER worked with. My 400lb self also works in health care, and I spend my nights working with people who could easily break my bones, changing incontinent patients, lifting people in and out of beds and chairs, and generally running around. You want to tell me I'm being hypocritical? Do you want to tell me that my body type should actually prevent me from having certain jobs? Do you know how damaging that is? That is actual, straight up, discrimination. And you know what? It happens. It's been documented.

I just don't understand how it is that I get questions like this and people expect me to react positively or be nice about it.

whiskey sleep and wolf dreams (the words are so loud in my head that they wake me)

heartfucksmouth:

Oh
my head don't feel so good
darling.

And
I wonder if I'll ever stop crying
on every drive home when
my headlights
illuminate
the most delicate flakes of snow
twirling and dancing in the wind
the way I wish I could if
my sorrow didn't weigh me down.

Oh
I wish my heart would stop racing
honey.

The music playing makes me think
of all the people I have ever known
Of those laid to rest
in cedar oak and stone

Oh,
I wish my mind would quiet down.

And I wonder why
the most intricate souls disappear so quickly
like when my hushed tears fall
from my lashes onto
the snowflakes gathered
in my upturned palm
dissolving
before I truly get the chance to
know their beauty.

freakishlyme replied to your post: I have a...

freakishlyme replied to your post: I have a problem.

Which is your favourite, just out of curiosity?

Oh, that’s like the hardest question ever. I’m so picky with cast members, but I think the strongest cast is probably the 10th Anniversary Cast—plus the fact that it was recorded live is a big thing for me. Musicals should be live, not in studio, you know? I think my second favorite is the OBC, though. I wish the Complete Symphonic Recording had a better cast, because it really is the entire musical from beginning to end, but I’d say it’s the weakest cast out of all of them. That’s my professional opinion :P

I have a problem.

On my iTunes, I have:

• Les Miserables Original Broadway Cast
• Les Miserables Original London Cast
• Les Miserables Complete Symphonic Recording
• Les Miserables 10th Anniversary Concert
• Les Miserables 25th Anniversary Concert
• Les Miserables Highlights from the Motion Picture
• Les Miserables Original French Cast
• Les Miserables Polish Cast

and I’m still looking for the Spanish version.

…yup.

red3blog: marfmellow: mikeychickie44: itsoktobethin: bigmamau...

red3blog:

marfmellow:

mikeychickie44:

itsoktobethin:

bigmamaunikorn:

drbrucebananer:

so, it's pretty common to see an image like this with like an article about body image or eating disorders or whatever

and then they go on to talk about what a problem it is and how sad all these young women are hating themselves and hurting themselves because they think they are fat, when they aren't

implying that if they were actually fat, then there wouldn't be a problem, it would be totally normal and expected (as it is) to hate their bodies and hurt themselves over it.

fat bodies shouldn't be used to represent poor self-image and low self-esteem, just the same way fat bodies shouldn't be used to represent greed, laziness, gluttony, disease, or any of the other nasty shit that fat bodies too often symbolize

you know who sees a fat girl in the mirror every day? fat girls. and I wanna see a picture of a fat girl seeing her own reflection in the mirror, and I wanna see the article talking about why that girl doesn't need to hate herself or starve herself or think herself unworthy of love.

YO THIS

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. 

FUCK THIS SHIT. 

That's not the fucking point of this god damn image at fucking all. This shit is about a girl who fucking hates her self because she feels fucking worthless. A byproduct of that is that she sees herself as fat. Does fat mean low self esteem or lack of confidence. FUCK NO. 

Her depression and what ever the fuck else is wrong with her does. 

You just fucking negated every single fucking person who has had an eating disorder.

"implying that if they were actually fat, then there wouldn't be a problem," WHAT THE FUCKING HELL WITH THIS SHIT. The problem isn't whether or not a person is fat, it's how they look at themselves. 

THIS POST REEKS OF IGNORANCE. If you don't fucking know what it's fucking like to have an eating disorder then don't fucking comment on this shit. 

Not everything is about fat girls and fat girl problems on this website - despite how many fat girls try to butt themselves into EVERY-SINGLE-IMAGE-ON-TUMBLR.

They have to police every artistic drawing, every cartoon, every movie, every novel.

"THERE R NO FAT PPL IN THAT ARTISTS DRAWING"
"WHERE R THE FAT PPL"
"THIS IS WRONG BECAUSE I SAID SO BECAUSE I AM FAT AND U CANT DRAW WHAT U WANT"

Like…jesus. 

The GIF is showing the mental pain the girl feels because she see's herself one way that isn't even in reality. 

Completely disregarding the fact that eating disorders are mental illnesses and the women are not intentionally trying to put down fat girls is stupid. 

The women have mental illnesses. It is not a slight against fat women - it is their own inability to see reality for what it is, and it is upsetting and invades all parts of their life. 

Women with eating disorders don't CHOOSE to have it. 

Sick of seeing fat women on this site police every damn thing on here. 

and this is why the bolded is fucking necessary. 

the fact that someone seeing themselves as worthless = fat and not just them as they actually are being worthless is a BIG fucking problem for people who are fat and who DO NOT SEE THEMSELVES AS WORTHLESS.

What marfmellow said times a billion. Any response to ED that actively affirms fat stigmatization is failing EVERYONE, fat people and persons with ED. So much of how our culture responds to ED is in the context of "Body Acceptance for Acceptable Bodies". ED is bad if you are thin, but actively encouraged if you are fat. Frankly, most people I've known with ED recognize this very regularly, but obviously some are eager to cloak themselves in thin privilege and try to base a recovery on the notion that all of their hatred was 100% okay, just not for themselves. This has escalated now to people insisting that fat stigmatization should be a protected part of ED and its ableist to object to any fat shaming or thin idealization.

Just look at how people are aggressively trying to center themselves in this discussion. Yet, look at this image. That's not a drawing, that's a video. That fat reflection is a person. A person who was expected to play the part of the worthless reflection of a morally superior person. This kind of framing just endorses fat hate and that's powerfully damaging to people with EDs and fat people and those who fall into both groups.

Reblogging for such excellent commentary.

100% pro at dressing inappropriately for the weather.

It’s blizzarding out…windy, snow, etc. everyone’s huddled against the weather in coats and gloves and hats and boots.

I’m wearing a dress, leggings, a cardigan, and flats.

No fucks given.

oh, this song.

oh, this song.

fucccckkkkk

i’ve been up all night and i’m exhausted but my body’s not letting me sleep

i can’t take anything because i have to be up at noon to meet my mother for something

i wish i could go out to breakfast but lol i have no friends

i just want to sleep

wheelieinthekitchen replied to your post: fuck...

wheelieinthekitchen replied to your post: fuck comcast

Fuck that! We cancelled completely just over a year ago because of their bullshit. Now we just get basic channels with an antennae and watch Netflix/Hulu. Stupid cable :(

It’s not even cable, though, it’s just internet. I haven’t had a TV in going on two years. i can watch anything I need online. But the internet bill is killing me :(

fuck comcast

i’m really fucking exhausted and i have a headache that just won’t quit and it’s making me unable to sleep. so i thought i’d pay some bills with my tax refund.

i need to downgrade my internet service because i got some special when i signed up but it was only for the first 6 months, and after that my bills just way too high and i can’t afford it.

so i go to the comcast website—PLENTY of options to upgrade—but to downgrade? lol nope.

so i do the ~chat with a representative~ thing, and he tells me the only way to downgrade is to call the 800 number.

i wanted to be like, have you ever heard of this thing called severe social anxiety? fuck you. there’s a reason i do things on the internet instead of by phone/in person. fuck, i won’t even get take out from most places unless i can order it online.

fuck fuck fuck

Because I shouldn't have to explain myself, especially when I...

Because I shouldn't have to explain myself, especially when I ask nicely?

Because my face and my body is my property and contrary to popular belief, I do have a say in where they're allowed to go?

Because I asked you to remove it?

Because me asking you, NICELY, to remove it does not give you permission to go to my blog and reblog MORE of my pictures?

Because you're a fucking dickbag and congratulations, now you get called out on it publicly!

Maybe if you read these posts:

http://randomlancila.tumblr.com/post/43265786795
http://teen-boy-fag.tumblr.com/post/41456272935/attn-if-you-run-a-porn-blog

you'll learn how to become a decent internet denizen.

But I'm betting not.

#naked #bedhead

#naked #bedhead

2am #selfies

2am #selfies

raspberrying: "What are your hobbies??? What do you do for fun? Do you play any sports??!?"

raspberrying:

"What are your hobbies??? What do you do for fun? Do you play any sports??!?"